Every Child Should Be Loved

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the devastating effect upon a person’s life of not being loved when they are small. Really, not just the effect upon that person’s life, but upon the life of society. As much as I can see the point behind the anti-abortionist’s viewpoint (trying to say that all life is valuable and that you can never know the contribution), I have to say, in the end, that it is total crap.

Forget the issue of a woman’s right to choose, though I do not ever forget that, and instead think about what it means to be not a small child, but an adult in the world when you were a mistake or unexpected ‘addition’. To be such a person is to never ever be completely whole because of what happens to you in the first 5 or 6 years of your life. You will always suffer from your subconscious mind being formed during those very early years without the kind of loving influences wanted children will have. Odds are you will, in some very impactful way upon other people’s lives, become a thug, or a drain. You can make allowances for a lot, but you can’t really make allowances for thuggery. Nobody has the right to be a thug over other people. It is not love to look upon love as owning the object of your affections. Ending the cycle of being a drain also takes super human effort. It takes a level of self-honesty very few people trapped in such a cycle will be able to muster. More difficult still is finding the resources you need in order to become whole without destructively engaging other people by demanding from them always more than they can really give. Going against the right to abortions or birth control, and thus the right to wait until you are ready to have children you can love, is really doing nothing but greatly increasing the probability  of thuggery, selfishness and disaster in society.

As an aside, to say that being anti-abortion is not the same as being anti-birth control is also bunk. Look, there are two ways to gather evidence and make determinations: using pure reason and using empirical evidence. Denying that equivalency doesn’t pass the empirical evidence test. Time and time again those who claim that their anti-abortion viewpoints are only that, against abortion, have been proven not to be only that, but instead the tip of the spear which enfolds an entire system of beliefs which are deeply rooted in the evolutionary paradigm. That’s right, not rooted in religion at all, but in the arguments of evolution. The service you think you have been giving to your God, all of that hatred you have allowed to grow inside of yourself toward others, has actually been an offering to a God of violence. You have actively been sending unloved children into the hands of Molech.

It is only through man’s activity on a social level that man escapes the bounds of evolution and becomes a post-evolutionary creature on a meta-level. Only on a social level does the potential for organization exist which truly changes things regarding the primacy of the human condition. Only whole people can truly participate effectually at that meta-level. All people who are not whole tend to act out of the evolutionary paradigm toward the interests of that paradigm. Which is to say that those who are loved when small can put on and take off personas when those who are bent can usually only put them on. Likewise, the ability to judge the efficacy of a persona for keeping it is much more likely to exist in a whole person than someone trapped viewing life through the lens of a repetitive cycle.

Of course there is more to it than this, including, not least of all, the level of permissiveness for behaviors that are problematic within the context of a social framework. In any context the more intelligent or curious will always tend toward experiment. Those who manipulate and those who Lord it over others, no matter how well formed during their childhoods, who act in those ways and are not stopped by the group are still going to think they can act that way when it is not appropriate or even when it is destructive. Ditto for those who learn to just give in.

Can those who are damaged from not being loved make it happen for themselves anyway? Of course they can, but on the one hand it would be something if such children had the courage themselves not to have children if they find they cannot, except they don’t. Or, maybe, if on the other hand they could confront their inner demons first, so that their kids could be healthy,  but who needs that when your emotional need to procreate is so powerful? Instead the very Catholic arguments regarding the sacredness and obligations of life creep in, and before you know it the practice of foul parenting gets passed along. The very damaged beget the very damaged, to the tune of approximately 7 or so billion people on the planet today. Look, the numbers are in humanity’s favor, we will most likely be sticking around. The world doesn’t need any more thugs or emotionally fragile or possessively over-reactive people. The world, in fact, very greatly needs fewer of those kinds of people.

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